Loaded High John the Conqueror Cross

How to Make a High John the Conqueror Cross Fetish

The first large fetish I ever made, this piece is based a vision that popped into my head one afternoon when I realized that John The Conqueror and Jesus The Christ both shared the same initials.

And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.” [Matthew 6:5-6]

Jesus has been given the prehensile paws of a raccoon, “for you know quite well that the day of the Lord’s return will come unexpectedly, like a thief in the night.” [1 Thessalonians 5:2]; His crown has been woven from strands of Devil’s Shoestring to keep dark forces at bay [Ephesians 6:12] and His cross framed by two pigeon wings [Psalm 55:6].


  1. Go on eBay and search for a “sick call crucifix,” but make sure your purchase is large enough to hold a decent stash of ingredients – the real wood crucifixes are best, since you can write on them too.
  2. Scratch your name in a yellow candle (preferably with a coffin nail) and anoint it with John the Conqueror oil from the top down in a twisting motion; so too a purple candle (on that one you can write “I conquer, I conquer, I conquer”)
  3. Light the candles and load the hollow cross with ingredients one by one, for example:
    1. 7 John the Conqueror roots
    2. 5 microscopic gold nuggets
    3. 3 mercury dimes
    4. Alum chunks
    5. Angelica root
    6. Basil
    7. Benzoin
    8. Blessed Thistle
    9. Cascara Sacrada
    10. Cloves­
    11. Devil’s shoestring
    12. Eucalyptus leaves
    13. Frankincense
    14. Hyssop
    15. Myrrh
    16. Sage
  4. Light some John the Conqueror incense if you have it, otherwise a mixture of frankincense, myrrh and tobacco should be fine
  5. As you load your ingredients, pause to rap each one on the table three times before spraying it with a mouthful of whiskey and using it to make the sign of the cross over the candles, saying: “In the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost, I bless this ________ to bring me love, luck and laughter.”
  6. If you want you can also make a name paper consisting of your own name written out 3, 5, 7, 9 or 13 times with pencil on a square piece of paper sack, then rotated and covered perpendicularly with a phrase indicating the conditions you want to be “crossed” with, e.g., “LOVE LUCK AND LAUGHTER,” “POWER PROTECTION AND PASSION,” “HEALTH AND HAPPINESS”, etc.(Traditionally, three is for wishes, five is for love, seven is for luck, nine is for power and thirteen is for uncrossing and purification.)
  7. In the center of the name paper, add a Mercury dime and your own toenail and fingernail clippings, along with hair from your crotch, armpits and head. Smear it with oil and then fold it towards yourself, praying for what you want; then put it into the hollow crucifix.
  8. Once the hollow cross has been fully loaded, seal the ingredients in with melted beeswax, being careful not to burn yourself. Breathe your prayer into the compartment, throw in a lit match, and slide the front of the cross shut.
  9. As a final step, you might also want to get a gold leafing pen from Amazon and write related Bible verses on the cross itself while praying them aloud (of course), e.g.:
    1. Psalm 23
    2. Psalm 57
    3. Isaiah 45:23
    4. John 1:1-8
    5. Matthew 6:6
    6. Whatever speaks to you

Dr. Octopus

A 20-year practitioner of hoodoo, renowned spiritual worker Dr. Octopus is a Gnostic bishop, Kimbisero, expert on Thai necromantic amulets (so-called "barang") and licensed clinical Hypnotist. He likes rainy days and black coffee.